Monday, September 21, 2009

Different and the Same

Things I will do differently during this pregnancy:

  • I won't wait for 3 months to announce that I’m pregnant (check that off the list).

  • I won't gain as much weight.

  • I won't buy maternity clothes ahead of time, but wait until I absolutely need something to buy it.

  • I won’t keep a pregnancy journal.  I loved keeping a journal last time, but I re-read it and there were only a few things that I found interesting, all of which I can capture this time on the blog.

  • I'll give birth in a hospital instead of at a birth center.  I wish I could do it the exact same way as last time, but there are no birth centers with tubs in Northern Virginia.  Now that I'm more experienced, I think, barring complications, I can achieve what I want in a hospital - a calm, natural birth - without having to shell out a few grand since health insurers are too stupid to realize that hospitals waste money like crazy on childbirth. (Actually, I know why they don't cover birth centers - it's not stupidity, it's that all coverage is decided by pressure group warfare and birth center users are not a big enough group to have an impact.)

  • I’ll slow down towards the end and try to take it easy so the baby doesn’t come too early – Sammy came 2 weeks early, which was great, but I don’t want it to be any sooner than that, so why push it?  With Sam, I started a business 6 weeks before my due date which had me squatting and lifting boxes up until the day before she arrived.  I must have gone a little loco there at the end.

  • I’ll eat sushi occasionally (in fact, I already have).


 Things I will do the same during this pregnancy:

  • I'll drink a cup of coffee every morning.

  • I'll drink a glass of wine on occasion (after the first trimester).  It's especially fun to do at restaurants.

  • I'll enjoy eating for two.

  • I'll have every diagnostic test as early as possible.

  • I'll do my Kegels.

  • I'll do some form of exercise.  Last time it was a bit of yoga, a great pregnancy workout tape, and a lot of dog walking.  That worked very well for me so I'll probably stick with it.

  • I'll get prenatal massages (in fact, I've already signed a contract with Massage Envy for one massage per month!).

  • I'll get pedicures as soon as I can't easily reach my feet.  This is an indulgence I normally scoff at as wasteful, but, ohmygod, it is so worth it during pregnancy.  Not only does one part of your body look dainty and pretty, but it's so good for those aching, swollen feet.

  • I'll play the pregnancy card with Adam for as many foot rubs as possible.  Because you can't get a pedicure every day.

  • I'll have a natural birth if possible.

  • I'll (we'll) find out the sex.

  • I'll (we'll) wait to decide on a name until I (we) see the baby.  We had 3 choices lined up when Sammy was born and it was nice to look at her face and try to decide what suited her best.  (The other 2 were Maia and Zoe.)

  • I'll take pictures of myself every month.  If I get as huge as last time, you'll be very entertained.

  • I won’t take this amazing experience for granted. 

6 comments:

  1. May I ask the reasoning behind your choice to announce your pregnancy immediately instead of waiting 3 months this time around? (Of course I'm glad you have announced it so soon so that your friends can share in your joy!) Does the fact that it's a second pregnancy and not a first have any bearing on it? It's always seemed so paranoid to me to wait to announce a pregnancy until the second trimester; it's almost as though by waiting you are signaling that you expect something to go wrong, which is of course the wrong attitude to take.

    However, during a first pregnancy I can understand erring on the side of caution since you don't have experience with pregnancy or knowledge that you'll be able to carry successfully to term, and I can't imagine the pain of having to spread the news of a miscarriage after having already spread the happy news of a pregnancy.

    I have my own thoughts on this issue but would love to hear yours!

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  2. Tori, miscarriages are very common and lots of women have multiple miscarriages, so there is definitely a good reason to wait until the risk is minimal - usually after 12 weeks. I generally think it's a wise thing to do. But because I had a problem at 24 weeks my first time around, it didn't do me any good. I've had no miscarriages, which, I believe, means that I'm less at risk this time, although I'm guessing about that.

    Mostly, announcing the news is a way for me to fight the strong tendency to fear the worst. If I was hiding this, I would be much more in the state of, "well, maybe I'll have a baby, maybe not." I still feel that way, but this is a concrete way to stay positive. Another factor: I'll probably be showing by 12 weeks. Finally, another factor is that I just can't keep my big mouth shut! I'm the worst secret-keeper ever.

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  3. I think it's going to be fun going along for the ride with you in a small way. Thanks for sharing.

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  4. Thanks for your explanation. It makes a lot of sense to me and aligns with my idea that keeping a pregnancy a secret is in at least some way giving more credence to the idea that something will go wrong. And I have a big mouth, too.

    Thanks for sharing. Like Lynne, I'm very glad you're sharing your pregnancy journey with your readers in this way.

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  5. Amy, I gave birth naturally at Virginia Hospital Center using a doula and Karen King, a midwife who works at Arlington Women's Center, which is attached to the hospital. I think enough women in this area want a natural birth that the hospitals are getting more used to it.

    And, congratulations!

    Michelle (Adam's colleague)

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  6. Michelle - nice to see you here! I did find an ob-gyn practice that has midwives: Fairfax Ob-Gyn. They use Inova Fair Oaks Hospital. I had my first appointment today and I'm not totally thrilled with them, but I think it will be ok. If I keep getting the sense that they are going to medicalize me, I'll hire a doula too. If I do, I'll be asking you about yours! Thanks!

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