Thursday, July 30, 2009

Clueless

I have no idea how to potty train a child, and I've done nothing serious with Sam in that regard yet.   I'm not sure why I haven't read a dozen books on the subject like I normally do in my uptight OCD way.  I just can't seem to take it seriously.  I keep thinking it will just happen on it's own, and if it doesn't, well, I'll figure something out.  Very unlike me.

Sam has gone on the potty a few times (once while we were on vacation!) but she's never done it regularly.  But preschool is coming quickly and she's supposed to be using the potty by the time she starts.  Yikes!  Now I'm getting a little bit scared.

So today I put underwear on her and told her she could wear them for a few hours each morning from now on.  (Thank god for princess panties and Sam's love of everything girlie.)  I guess I'm just trying to get her to be aware of when she pees.  She knows when a #2 is coming because if I look in her direction she yells at me, DON'T LOOK AT ME, MOMMY!  (That's how I caught the opportunity while on vacation.)  But with #1, she has no clue.  The few times she's had an accident on the floor she looks down with surprise and says, PEE!  Like, where did that come from?  That's not mine!  But I'll step in it anyway - PUDDLE, YEA!

The diapers we have are so good that she has never been aware of pee at all, from what I can tell.  So we'll try this underwear thing and see how it goes.  We're both clueless and I have no real plan and I dread the mess.  Actually, I did have a plan but I already abandoned it.  I was going to just leave her in underwear all day.  But after she made 3 puddles I gave up and put on the diaper.  I mean, I had to take a shower.  And what if we want to go somewhere?  We'll start with mornings.  Yeah, that's a good plan.

6 comments:

  1. I'm the last person on Earth who is qualified to give potty training advice. So I won't.

    Instead, I'll commend you for being so relaxed about the process! I think that will serve you very well. :o)

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  2. We've been struggling with this too. I think our older boy is almost exactly the same age as Sam, and he also has been trying to learn, with us parents in low-pressure mode, for a long... LOOOOOOONNNNGGGGGG... time. He's pretty good about #1 in the sense that he doesn't make too many puddles, but usually this requires us reminding him every hour or so that he needs to (i.e., has to) go try. But if too much time passes, or even sometimes after just a short while, he'll have an accident. It's like he's oblivious to the fact that this is something he can control -- or rather it's like he's obvious to the fact that maybe, just maybe, it's worth the minimal effort to control it. And then #2 is a complete non-starter. He did go on the potty once -- about 7 months ago now, I believe it was. But he just refuses to do it again. He does have #2 accidents in his underwear which are, you know, less than fully pleasant. But for the most part he is in complete control of the function, and just chooses to wait until bedtime (or, when he naps, naptime). He knows that the only reason he's allowed to come out of his room is that he pooped, so you can see how it's going to come out. A few weeks ago he made three tiny separate poops at three different times during his 1.5-hour nap/quiettime period. Sheesh. I mean, it's good that he's starting to be in full control of it. But still not so good that he is apparently scared to death of going on the potty.

    If you make any progress with Sam, please post your discoveries!

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  3. Travis - Sam has never peed on the potty. (She'll be 3 in Sept, by the way.) She's pooped on it many times. I really think she has no idea about peeing at all. She is just totally unaware of it.

    Why don't you revoke the rule about coming out of his room if he poops? What's the worst that could happen? Tell him that if he poops, he has to live with it until morning. And if that means diapers at night to minimize mess, that seems better than making no progress at all.

    Sam fought the underwear this morning, but finally put them on for about an hour. No puddles today. Maybe she held it??? I'll keep y'all posted.

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  4. Amy,

    I'm by no means an expert, but for some reason, my two oldest and our neighbor's 3-year old all took initiative to potty train themselves after reading a book called "The Prince and the Potty".

    With Tara (2 and 1/2), it started two months ago. She asked to have us read her that book every night for a couple weeks. Then, one day, she decided she wanted to be a big girl and wear big girl underwear. There have been a few accidents since, but for the most part, she's been doing great. We also threw in some bribes for trying to sit on the potty and a reward for success. We've weaned her off of those now.

    Our neighbor, who has a 3 year old, was trying to potty train their daughter with limited success. But after borrowing The Prince and the Potty, she apparently decided she wanted to be a big girl too.

    Most of the ideas come for another book I bought a couple years back called Potty Training in One Day.

    Good luck.

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  5. It's funny to come across this because my magically potty trained 3 year is (hopefully) on the tail end of a relapse. I guess I can't even call it a relapse because she (Ashley) barely ever made any kind of puddle or other mess. After just a couple weeks of pull ups and then telling her if she kept them clean she could have panties like her big sister, that was it and that was at about 2.5. The worst was a drop or two in her panties when we went a very long time without reminding her. Since returning from a week long vacation at the beach in the beginning of July she's made many a puddle. I think she's recovered to her normal control but it was frustrating.

    Her older Sister Allison (4.5) has always been inconsistent, she is generally very good but will get wet at least once a week for about a year now. And usually if she has a bad day, 2 or 3 times. I know it was a bad day when I come home and find her in PJs for dinner.

    But our strategy has just been to ease into the idea with pull-ups and then panties even on top of pull-ups pick a time and go for it with the panties full time and be vigilant on reminding/asking if she needs to use the potty. And pull-ups for naps/bedtime until those show signs of consistently staying dry.

    I still wake up Allison to pee before I go to bed, otherwise she pretty consistently wets the bed.

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  6. It's nice to hear everyone's stories. Thanks! We're still waiting for that first pee on the potty. She still seems to be totally unaware of peeing.

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