Another Mystery

Yesterday's post reminded me of another mystery:  How can someone walk around all day without extreme anxiety, knowing this is sitting on his bathroom counter?



That is a bottle of rubbing alcohol (doesn't that stuff evaporate quickly or something?), with the cap upside down, balancing on the neck of the bottle, and a Q-Tip on top for good measure.  Oh, and did you notice that the bottle is hanging off the edge of the recessed sink?

Men are weird.  And yes, I put it away after I took the photo.

Does 6+6=4+8?

Is it just me, or would this make you uncomfortable about drinking the soda, too?  I mean, I don't see how that could have happened as an error in the normal packaging process.  (Yes, the 4-pack and the 8-pack were both inside the 12-pack, which is supposed to contain loose cans.)

Mysteries

Why do parents make the rule, "no running in the house?" 

And while we're at it, why do parents make the rule, "no jumping on the bed?"

Baffling.

Mysteries

Why, on those HGTV shows that I can't stop myself from watching, do the hosts always say, "Oh, you don't like the paint color?  That's an easy fix."  Every real estate agent I've used says the same thing.

Sorry, but painting is not an easy fix!  If you do it yourself, you need a couple of days per room, plus the cost of supplies which is not insignificant.  You can't paint a little bit here and a little bit there.  You need to have big blocks of time, so, if you're like us, you'll have to hire it out.  If you do, it is close to $1000 per room (at least that's the big city price), and you still have quite a bit of inconvenience.

I got three quotes to paint the entire interior of our house including all doors and trim, and two of them were higher than the cost of replacing all the windows in the house.  Can you imagine that?  Something just seems off here.  Luckily, I think I found a guy who will do it for just a bit over half that.  He was recommended by someone I trust, so as long as I watch him and his crew like a hawk, I'm hoping it will be ok.  There's nothing more disturbing than a bad paint job.  We've been living with what one painter called "the worst touch up job I have ever seen" for a year now.

Tip: When buying a house, if the paint is in bad shape, ask the seller for a credit of about $1,000 per big room (don't count bathrooms and hallways - just bedrooms, living room, kitchen, etc.).  And if they won't give it to you and you still want the house, make sure you have that much to spend.

And don't trust HGTV!

Mysteries

Since we had Sammy, I've been running a lot more plastic through the dishwasher.  It seems obvious now, but I couldn't figure out why the ceramic and glass would come out dry and the plastic would always be wet.  Answer:  Ceramic and glass are better heat conductors and therefore stay hot longer and get drier than plastic.  Duh!

Since that mystery was solved, here's another one.  Why doesn't anybody make a lightweight children's step stool taller than a measly 8 inches?  We have stools all over the house, but have yet to figure out a good solution for the bathroom sinks.  Right now, this is what we have to deal with in our tiny powder room:



If you look closely, you can see that the stool blocks almost half the doorway.  It is a tiny space and I can't imagine keeping it like this as long as Sammy needs a stool.  She has to stand on the 2nd step and she can just barely reach the handles to turn on the water.  She cannot reach the soap because of that completely non-functional sink.  (For the life of me, I cannot understand why anybody would ever buy a pedestal sink.  There is no storage and no countertop space.  But that's another mystery altogether.)

Anyway, this is a mystery I haven't been able to solve.  Any ideas out there?

Mysteries

How come women pay $60, $70, $80 for a hair cut?  I'm not talking color or highlights or any other treatment.  A salon hair cut in the DC area costs at least $60 and I've been told that it can run over $100.  Why does it cost so much?  It makes no sense to me.  Is this one of those services where raising the price actually increases sales because customers then perceive that they are getting better quality?  It's a hair cut, for god's sake!  For $100, Iexpect you to cut my hair into the shape of the Venus de Milo.

I've been paying the high prices for the past year because I couldn't find a better option, but it was making me so sick to spend that much money that I finally went to Hair Cuttery and got an excellent cut for $21.  It's definitely better than my last $65 cut, which I had to fix with my own scissors the next day.  Also, it took less time and I didn't need an appointment.  Granted, I probably got lucky and got someone with skills, but I was prepared to try every person in that shop until I found someone who could do a good job.  I'm sure there are a couple of good people at all of these low end chains.  And even if a salon cut was better, could it really be THAT much better?  I really think we women are suckers for anything beautifying.  It's the female equivalent of the mysterious success of the "male-enhancement" products.

So I'm free of the need to spend outrageous amounts on a hair cut.  Highlights, however, are another matter.

Mysteries

How does a 27 pound human being make that much noise just walking across a wood floor?

Mysteries

If toddlers are so chubby, how can their knees and elbows be so sharp?

Mysteries

When do human beings lose the ability to drink lying down?  Samantha can still do it.

Mysteries

Why do parenting books and web sites tell you all the things you need to do to "baby-proof" your house, but make no mention of when you can remove all of that safety stuff?  I know it depends on the child, but really, I have no idea if I should still be pinning up the blind cords or keeping all the outlets covered.

Taking down the baby gates on the stairs and letting Sam go up and down at will led her to finally work on walking instead of crawling on the stairs.  (She can climb up without a handrail or even a wall for balance now!)  We also stopped locking up sharp objects (except razors) and only keep medicine and chemicals safely out of reach.  She has learned to be careful with sharp objects.  I'm not sure if there is any independence to be gained from the other things, though.

Mysteries

Don't web site designers do any market research?  Don't they know that stay-at-home-parents need more than just a few minutes before their session times out?  I want to be able to pay one bill without logging in three separate times!

Mysteries

Am I a chump for registering my products with the manufacturers?

Mysteries

Where did all the Texas Ruby Red Grapefruit go?  I haven't seen any in my local stores this winter.  I hope it's just a problem with this season and not a Virginia thing.

Mysteries

Why does my dog sniff around more outside when it snows?  Aren't smells muted when it is colder?  Is he just desparate to find his usual scents in the yard?  Does everything just smell different?

Or maybe it's all that yummy smelling bacteria and sulfate.

Mysteries

Why do I need to lower my thermostat when it is colder outside?

Mysteries

I have no idea how Google works.  Why am I the tenth hit when you search, "woman pooing her pants?"  Yikes!

Mysteries

Why isn't there a cleaning service that will do things like clean all the walls in the house?  Or wipe the sticky, linty film off the shelves in the laundry room?  Or bleach all the grout in the whole house?

Mysteries

Why do dogs think lotion is food?  At least cat poo has protein in it.

Mysteries

Here's another one:  Why do people use placemats?  Is it supposed to be easier to clean the placemat than the table?  I can understand a tablecloth, but only if you have an ugly table.  If it's a nice table, don't you want to see it?  This all seems to be one step away from covering your furniture in plastic.

Mysteries

Does anybody iron their clothes anymore?  I've never ironed and yes, my clothes are wrinkled some of the time (but not often, thanks to this).  But, seriously, after sorting, washing, and drying clothes, does anyone really get out an ironing board and an iron, put water in it, wait for it to heat up, and spend multiple minutes per item making them just perfect, then folding or hanging?  And I've heard a rumor that some people actually iron their sheets!  What planet do they live on?