This week, I took Zoe and Leo to the mall for the very first time. We strolled around, I bought a gift and a new winter coat, and I had lunch. I was very proud of myself for getting them out and having such a nice time doing it. But as I was changing my first diaper in a public restroom in about three years, I realized that by this age, Sam had not only been to the mall many times, but she had been to Arizona and Playa del Carmen, Mexico. She had flown on airplanes, hiked through the desert (well, okay, in her stroller), ridden on buses, and had even taken a ride on a catamaran. She had dipped her toes into the Caribbean Sea. By three months, Adam and I were experienced not only in changing diapers in public restrooms, but in changing them in tiny airplane bathrooms and on countertops in hotel lobbies.
Of course, those types of experiences are totally irrelevant to a baby. What is different is the experience for us, the parents. With Sam, we were determined not to let our baby interfere with our travels and adventures, and that was good. But with two babies and an older child, I am determined to do as little as possible, and to take things as slowly as possible. And that is working out well this time around. I know that we're going to have countless adventures together, all five of us, and this time I don't need to prove it to myself. This time, I can allow myself to take a time out from those things, and just relax and get to know these two little beings in peace.