I think another potty training update is in order. Since I wrote about it last, Sammy has gone through a terrible regression. I’ve heard that kids regress but I didn’t expect this. Over 10 days, Sammy just stopped pooping on the potty. She came home from school every day in different pants than she was wearing when she left, and sometimes the second pair were stained by the time she got home. She did fine with pee, and I think there were a couple of times that she did successfully poop, but I was cleaning up poop 2-3 times a day, every day, for those 10 days. (Of course, at this same time, the dog decided that he liked to step on his own poop in the backyard and drag it through the house, so I had to deal with that too. My washing machine has been busy.)
I was so temped to put a diaper on that girl. Oh, the relief it would have been. We could barely leave the house. Every time we went out, she pooped in her pants. She did it at our next-door neighbor’s house, she did it outside while playing with the neighbors, she did it at the restaurant, she did it at the toy store, and she did it in the car.
I was at my wit’s end. I tried to just take it in stride, but by the end, I was begging her to use the potty, and saying things like, “Sammy. Please! Please tell me why you aren’t using the potty.” I tried to just relax and let her go when she needed to go, but I couldn’t help but be constantly aware of imminent danger. When away from the house, I’d be sniffing and checking and asking every 5 minutes. I’m sure this did not help Sammy at all, but I didn’t know what else to do. One time, we were out to lunch and she had 3 separate accidents within one hour.
Last Thursday when I picked her up from school, I suggested that we go out to lunch. She got very excited – and then pooped in her pants. I had forgotten to re-load the potty bag with extra clothes that morning, so she had to put her dirty pants back on. I told her that now we could not go out to lunch because we had to get home to change her clothes. I wasn’t angry or trying to give her a guilt trip – I was just telling her the logical consequence of her actions. Then I told her that we could go out to lunch tomorrow, as long as she hadn’t had an accident at school. And that did it! From Friday forward, she has had zero accidents. None, nada, zip, zilch! No pee, no poo. I only remind her to go when we are leaving the house or if I see her doing the pee-pee dance.
I had ruled out rewards as a way to accomplish potty training, but when a logical consequence arose – one that mattered to her – she was finally self-motivated. I know she’ll have setbacks in the future. I hope they aren’t as bad as this one. But next time, I’ll be on the lookout for that consequence.
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